Oh Hello Again

[iamnotpolaris]

This isn't Emily's dorm room.
This is Milliways! Awesome.
"Hi, Bar," she says cheerfully. "Looks like I'm the first one in at the moment, huh?" she says, looking around at the otherwise-empty room.

Comments

[middlingalong]

"No, actually, I'd group bread closer to sweet."

[iamnotpolaris]

"Maybe it depends on the kind of bread. Or the kind of musk. Alas, due to the language barrier, we shall never know."

[middlingalong]

"Alas!"

[iamnotpolaris]

"So how are you liking Earth, while you're there? We haven't irreparably poisoned the atmosphere, I hope."

[middlingalong]

"It's quite breathable, no one has to live in arcologies. It's got an amazing moon. Noplace else has quite so nice a moon."

[iamnotpolaris]

"It's a lovely moon. Perfectly suited for late night strolls."

[middlingalong]

"I hear the eclipses are something else, but haven't had any in the hemisphere since I've been on the planet. It's gorgeous just doing standard moon operating procedure, though."

[iamnotpolaris]

"It really is. I've never seen a solar eclipse, but the lunar ones are awesome too."

[middlingalong]

"Most moons aren't the right size to do those things very neatly. It's one of Earth's more famous features. Top three."

[iamnotpolaris]

"What are the other two?"

[middlingalong]

"Birthplace of humanity, cultural center of the galaxy. There's richer planets, I think Tau Ceti and Escobar compete on population, but Earth has the good novelists and musicians and so on."

[iamnotpolaris]

"Oh, I thought you meant like physical features. Birthplace of humanity, bit obvious."

[middlingalong]

"Physical features it's the moon first, and second I guess the biodiversity - there are planets with native life but it tends to be inconvenient, fragile relative to terraforming, and not usually as well-developed as Earth's, and nobody puts all the kinds of beetles without missing any on a new place they're terraforming."

[iamnotpolaris]

"Oh, that makes sense. Now I'm imagining some poor terraformer crying over the difficulty presented by all these blasted beetles."

[middlingalong]

"There are really too many! I don't know a whole lot about terraforming but I imagine they must skimp on the plants, too."

[iamnotpolaris]

"I don't think anyone's going to cry over leaving behind poison ivy."

[middlingalong]

"I've never even heard of that, and based on the name I imagine you are right."

[iamnotpolaris]

"It produces chemicals that itch for weeks if you touch them. There's an urban legend about a guy who--never mind, it's not delicate."

[middlingalong]

"Is there a sign? Please do not be indelicate in this bar?" asks Ivan, looking around.

[iamnotpolaris]

"No, but in my experience men don't like stories involving nasty chemicals and a man's sensitive bits."

[middlingalong]

"This is true," Ivan admits, "but not for reasons of delicacy."

[iamnotpolaris]

"I feel like there's an innuendo there about the delicacy of the relevant area but the specifics are escaping me."

[middlingalong]

Ivan thinks for a moment. "I can't come up with anything," he sighs.

[iamnotpolaris]

"Tragic. Such a perfect opening, and neither of us enough of a cunning linguist to take advantage."

[middlingalong]

...sporfle. "That - only sort of works, I think the bar is translating, but it comes close enough. So to speak."