all's fair in love and war

[actualantichrist]

The four of them are sitting two-thirds of the way up an old live oak, passing around a canteen of tinny water and talking about magic.

Em wants it more than anyone. The rest of them all think she should be a psion, but she wants to be a mage, wants to paint the sky with fireworks and make clean energy and maybe become an astronaut and figure out a way to avoid the rocket equation.

Reuben, whose upcoming eclipse in March started the whole conversation, says he doesn't want powers at all and if he gets any he'll have them shut down. He wants to be a priest when he grows up, which the rest of them all agree is objectively way lamer than either mage or psion.

Faith, like any sane person, is hoping she'll eclipse, but she doesn't want it with Em's desperate hunger. If she doesn't get cool magic powers, she'll find something else awesome to do with her life. Right now she's thinking she wants to discover a new element (or maybe a new planet, she hasn't decided) and get it named after her. Fides, from the Latin for her name.

In the end, it's Jay who gets powers from his eclipse, and that doesn't work out so well for him.



The three of them are huddled together at Jay's funeral, Reuben in the stark cassock and surplice of an altar server, Em staring up at the sky like she's willing it to open up and rain fire and vengeance. Or at least rain.

The sky stays stubbornly blue. "My eclipse is in February," Faith says blankly, looking up at the moon and she sun in the sky together, so she doesn't look down at her friend's coffin instead. "Maybe I'll be the one who figures out how to bring back the dead. Maybe I can still fix everything."

"Faith, no," Reuben says, softly. "You can't think that way. You have to let him go. I hope -- I hope you don't eclipse, I couldn't bear if--"

"I don't have to do anything I don't want to," Faith retorts. "Just because you're scared--"

"Don't," Em says. "Not now. Just don't."

Faith eclipses anyway. She doesn't actually get a choice.



Virtuality is incredibly lame. She can't actually do anything, not for real. But she comes out of it with her new powers, and it's the most amazing thing that's ever happened to Faith. She can get people's attention, make them listen instead of laughing because she's young or female or a sub, and it's not easy but it's right, like catching a pitched ball perfectly and feeling it slam into your hand. People throw their attention all over the place, and she can fix that, help them pay attention to important things.

Like what she has to say.

School is boring, so Faith tells her parents she wants to be homeschooled, and what do you know, they listen. (She doesn't make them agree, of course. Even if she could, that would be horrible. She just helps them really sit down and listen to her, and understand how important this is and how carefully she's thought about it.) When she's ready she applies to the local college, and her resume is okay but the interviewer thinks she really stands out.

College is way better than high school. Class discussions are fun! Her favorite are classes with participation grades. She always gets A's in those.



They're standing by the grave when the two of them turn on her.

They tell her all the things she's been hearing her whole life, things she'd thought her friends would never say to her. They tell her that she shouts too loud, dreams too big, talks too much, that she acts before thinking, that she needs to stop. They want her to stop using her powers, to make herself less, to make herself normal.

Faith just stands there, too devastated to speak, and she cries, and when they're done she tells them that they're right, that she understands, that she's going to transfer colleges and stay with her mother's cousin and make a new start, meet new people whose minds she's never touched.

They let her go.

They were supposed to be her friends.



Faith doesn't know her aunt all that well, but of course Aunt Kelly is happy to have her niece stay with her for college. Faith's transfer application gets processed with perfect efficiency once she shows up to the office of the registrar and helpfully lets them know she really does need it dealt with soon. Kansas is no Texas, but it's okay, it'll do.

Her first class is apparently history of philosophy, which sounds unbearably boring, but it's a core requirement, so while Faith's advisor agrees that she should clearly be allowed to take something more interesting instead, no one actually seems to have the authority to make that happen. So: ancient philosophy it is.

Faith arrives early and sits in the front. After all, she'll surely have helpful insights to contribute!

Comments

[actualantichrist]

Faith blinks. "Wow. I'm suddenly feeling like the small-town Texas girl, I don't think I knew anyone at home who was dating more than, like, two people. At least not seriously. You must be very organized!"

[warmfeelings]

"About people!" beams Chelsea. "I can be a scatterbrain about anything else."

[actualantichrist]

"It's still a good skill to have! Would it be terrible of me to take advantage of you to help me meet people? Starting out in a new place is so hard, and I bet you know all about who's worth knowing."

[warmfeelings]

"I'd be delighted to introduce you to people! But I think everybody's worth knowing in their way so what sorts of people do you want to meet first?"

[actualantichrist]

"Um ... people who are really good at what they do, I guess, like, people who are good at school stuff are always helpful to know. Or at organizing interesting things to do, or dealing with emergencies -- maybe someone who's good at sports, I've been wanting to pick something up." Grin. "Don't need someone who's good at people, I'm keeping you around for that one."

[warmfeelings]

Chelsea laughs. "Afton's a tennis coach! I can just bring you home with me after school to meet him. And hmmm - oh hi, Joe!"

Joe appears to be the professor but doesn't react (except to smile at Chelsea) to being called by his first name. He passes out syllabi and gives an introductory lecture.

[actualantichrist]

The professor should really be paying more attention to Faith. Look at her, she's sitting right in front, putting the syllabus in her binder, what a responsible student, he should be able to tell she's going to be at the top of the class. That's okay, though, she can help him notice when she raises her hand and points out that thing about Plato. It's a good observation! She wouldn't want him to overlook it.

[alicornucopia]

"Excellent point," Joe says, and apparently Faith is in agreement with this other dead philosopher who they'll discuss in month two.

[actualantichrist]

Sigh. Dead white doms. She knew history of philosophy was going to be boring.

At least she met Chelsea! Chelsea is interesting.

[warmfeelings]

That particular dead dom was actually Middle Eastern but he didn't mention it and used the Latin transliteration so Faith's mistake is understandable. Hardly a mistake at all.

Chelsea makes plenty of smiley eye contact with Joe and nods when he makes assertions but she also texts during class.

[actualantichrist]

And who can blame her? She's probably texting someone way more interesting than Joe. Faith doodles swirls on her notebook and makes notes about something she might want to write a paper on.

The bell rings for passing period. Ugh, is the professor going to keep talking? That should really be against some rule. Doesn't he know they have places to get to?

It's hardly any effort to reach out and grab his attention, direct it at the clock. It's a very interesting clock. Distracting, even. Time to go, time to go, time to go...

[warmfeelings]

"...oh dear, I've kept you over. Well, your readings for next class are in your syllabus," Joe says.

"Bye Joe!" says Chelsea, packing up to go.

[actualantichrist]

"Doesn't he mind the first name thing?" Faith asks, zipping up her backpack.

[warmfeelings]

"Oh, me and Joe go way back, most people call him Mr. Yost."

[actualantichrist]

"That makes more sense! I guess growing up here, it's not that surprising that you'd end up knowing some of the professors too."

[warmfeelings]

"He lived down the street from me when I was little. What have you got next?" Don kisses her and she waves goodbye as he departs.

[actualantichrist]

Faith checks the calendar on her phone. "Calculus, ugh. Hope I can find a study buddy for that one. And then a lunch break, and just Spanish 2 in the afternoon. How about you?"

[warmfeelings]

"I have sociology and human sexuality and art history," says Chelsea. "I usually get lunch at the diner down the street, the Nautilus, you could come with if you wanted, I'm meeting Michelle and Sam. Eleven thirty."

[actualantichrist]

"I'd love to! If I wouldn't be intruding? I don't want to barge in on your date."

[warmfeelings]

"No, it's okay! They're really friendly! Michelle might hit on you but I can tell her not to."

[actualantichrist]

"It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you! And if, you know, she'll back off if I tell her to, but you probably wouldn't be dating her if she were one of those doms."

[warmfeelings]

"She's a switch. Leans dommier than I do but still a switch. And of course she'll stop if you don't like her that way."

[actualantichrist]

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to assume, I should really know better. In any case! I would love to meet her and Sam. And hang out with you more! The Nautilus, right? Like the thing in that book?"

[warmfeelings]

"I'm not actually sure what a nautilus is but that's what the diner's called! It's just down the street from the main campus entrance, a block north."

[actualantichrist]

"Awesome! I'll see you there, then. ItwasnicetomeetyouIlikeyourhair!" Faith waves and dashes off towards the math building.