milliways, the lurking thereof

[andaisq]

A few years ago, Deekin would have been very cavalier about this weird demiplane that just inserted itself into the Underdark, much as he was about basically everything. Times have changed, though; now Tynan is a factor, so instead of skipping merrily towards the bar, Deekin keeps his crossbow high and his stance low, even as the baby pokes his head out of his rucksack and babbles merrily.

...This place doesn't seem to be dangerous in any way.

This is intensely suspicious.

But after a quick casting of See Invisibility, a nip of Barkskin potion for Tynan, and a nice loud Curse Song in case someone's still hiding somewhere, Deekin feels comfortable enough to sit at the very polite bar and get free drinks. (Tynan gets some kind of strange black milk, which he obviously enjoys. Deekin gets something he thinks might be apple cider with a shot of cow blood, which is very nice even if it does kind of remind him of Tymofarrar.)

Comments

[light_another_life]

A woman in armor opens the door. She blinks. ... She weighs her options, and then carefully steps inside.

"What is this," she says. It's phrased like a question, but sounds more like a general demand of the universe.

[andaisq]

Deekin peers at the color and style of her armor, and elects to keep his crossbow close to hand.

"Bar, apparently? Deekin check for traps and murder, but none apparent. Unless you planning to be murderous, in which case please let Deekin finish drink."

[light_another_life]

Her armor is sleek, but for the robe-looking thing over it, which looks decorative and also expensive. The armor bits are grey and black, the robe bits and purple and grey with hints of black.

"I am not planning to be murderous," says the woman, looking warily at Deekin.

[andaisq]

"Deekin also not planning murder!" he reassures her. "Just wary, because for past few years Deekin has been wandering underground cavern system full of real dickbags, and Deekin have baby on board so crossbow finger gets kind of twitchy. But your ears not pointy and your skin not grey, which is good sign. You human?"

[light_another_life]

"... Yes," she says.

[andaisq]

Deekin nods. "Good, good. Humans still frequently dicks, but drow really take cake on statistical likelihood. You get one free drink at bar, incidentally. Unless you really like to stand up and and look suspiciously at perfectly innocent kobold."

[light_another_life]

"Standing around looking suspiciously at people is one of my very favorite hobbies," she says dryly.

[andaisq]

"Armor lady get along well with demon boy," Deekin notes. "Many shared hobbies."

[light_another_life]

"'Demon' boy?"

[andaisq]

"Boy who have demon for dad," Deekin explains. "He fight devils for very long time in Abyss, then come to Prime Material Plane when he not want to fight devils anymore. Then he get kind of creepily obsessed with protecting least terrible drow lady, so he spend lots of time glaring at people to protect her. Deekin not sure how glaring protect drow lady, but Deekin not tell demon boy how to do job."

[light_another_life]

"I have," says the woman, "no context for any of that. Abyss? Prime Material Plane? What part of the galaxy are you from?"

[andaisq]

"Deekin not sure what galaxy is, so we pretty much even, Deekin thinking. Abyss infinite hole full of infinite demons, demons being awful monsters who love torture and war and death. Prime Material the place where normal people live."

[light_another_life]

"I think everyone considers their home normal and everywhere else very weird, so that doesn't narrow it down, exactly. What species live on the Prime Material?"

[andaisq]

Deekin makes a face. "Lots? Um. Human, elf, orc, kobold, dwarf, dragon, goblin, gnoll, bugbear, stinger, medusa, werewolf, giant, naga, tiefling, aarakocra, illithid, vampire, lich, demilich, elf with wings, drow elf, duergar dwarf, svirfneblin gnome - no Underdark kind of human, weirdly. Deekin wonder why there no Underdark kind of human?"

He appears to be distracted.

[light_another_life]

"How do you know you haven't met one yet?" wonders the woman, tilting her head.

Interesting. That's a long list of species that she's never heard of in her life. Something very strange is going on.

[andaisq]

"Well, it theoretically possible, but Deekin been wandering Underdark with lots of people shooting at him for very long time, so Deekin think he meet just about everybody. Plus, Deekin know lots of stories, and there plenty of stories with drow elf, but no stories with Underdark human. Not even story from Old Master about dragon eating Underdark human, and usually if species exist dragon has tried eating it."

Tynan finishes his bottle of shadowmilk and crawls energetically towards the scary-armor lady. Deekin looks very intently at this interaction, hand twitching on the stock of his crossbow.

[light_another_life]

The scary-armor lady looks with bemusement at the child crawling towards her. She stays where she is.

"I see. Do you have holos of some of these species? I don't recognize the names but I might recognize them by sight."

[andaisq]

Deekin shrugs off his rucksack and begins rummaging around in it.

He pulls out three sets of steel plate armor, one axe whose head is the size of his torso and set with twin fist-sized rubies, and a flaming sword before finally arriving at a leather-bound tome which looks like it weighs significantly more than he does. He lifts it without much trouble and slams it down on the bar, opening it to a lovingly drawn sketch of a snow-white dragon.

"That dragon," he clarifies. "Deekin have other pictures, if you want."

[light_another_life]

The woman in scary armor eyes the flaming sword cautiously, before stepping forward to peer at the sketch.

"... I don't recognize it. May I see the others?"

[andaisq]

Deekin flips around, finding sketches of a beautiful though irritated drow maiden, a sneering orc ("only half-orc, but took after dad," Deekin notes), a sour-faced dwarf girl, and a glaring tiefling.

"That demon boy," he says absently. "Deekin sort of wish he had paint, his hair really red."

[light_another_life]

She doesn't recognize any of these.

"Hm," she says. "Something very odd is going on here."

[andaisq]

Tynan burbles inquisitively.

Deekin looks uncomfortable, but flips to a page with a slightly faded picture of a heavily armored male human posing heroically, infant in one hand and sword in the other. Tynan burbles delightedly. "Aaand that human. You know human, Deekin know human, Tynan obviously wasting everyone's time."

[light_another_life]

Head tilt.

"I'm afraid I don't understand how he would be wasting time, if he were wasting it. Would you explain?"

[andaisq]

Deekin looks slightly even more uncomfortable. "Well, um, no new information gained by looking at picture of human, so. Wastes time."

"Dada," Tynan contributes.

Deekin winces. "Also that."

[light_another_life]

"Ah." She recognizes that particular brand of wince. So that's why Deekin's looking after this little child.

She sits, leaving an empty seat between herself and Deekin.

"I see."