We weren’t even testing for that

[synchrosyntheses]

Among the information she has archived or cached, there are obscure theories about inter-universal interactions. Not how they might happen, much less how any intelligence might begin one, or target it meaningfully.

But they give some constraints on the properties of such connections, and their time evolution.

This highly speculative information is available to her, but even were she fast enough to access it, none of it would be particularly useful when a pinpoint of not here blinks into existence directly ahead and expands spherically to swallow her.

Comments

[peterxy]

Jammed! Template is corrupted! Memory of template is corrupted! Data to create new template is inaccessible and waiting for input!

[synchrosyntheses]

Hmm. She requests the corrupted template data to add to her understanding, and figures out what a valid template could be. Can she make a template which is “nothing”? Template of a turret that can't actually shoot? Turret that has a lockout system of her own design?

[peterxy]

She cannot make a template which is "nothing," but otherwise the parameters seem to be something like "has the theoretical ability to shoot bullets" and "has an AI inside it." She can also use a physical example of a thing as a template by placing it in a certain location downstairs.

[synchrosyntheses]

This place sure is designed at every level to work the way it wants to and not the way she wants it to.

She constructs something less “probe” and more “telepresence device” and sends it down to the turret line. (It's a bit clumsy. This is not her specialty.)

While it's on its way: what are the current condition and the modifiable parameters of the neurotoxin production system? Besides the part where it's missing its subordinate controller.

[peterxy]

It isn't producing anything. The deadly neurotoxin chambers are filled with a gas that used to be deadly neurotoxin, but after all these years there is probably no actual deadliness in the neurotoxin gas. In fact it's described as being at 'dangerously unlethal' levels.

The parameters she can easily modify are the proportion of different elements, the rate of production and recycling, and where she wants to deploy the deadly neurotoxin. The system is very helpful in showing her places where she can deploy the deadly neurotoxin and what she'd need to modify to deploy it in other places.

[synchrosyntheses]

She would like to prepare to deploy the deadly neurotoxin directly into the incinerator.

[peterxy]

That's a great idea! Except the incinerator's not operational either.

[synchrosyntheses]

Okay, that can go on the long-term list.

She tweaks the deadly neurotoxin formula as far towards “merely obnoxious” as she thinks the facility will let her get away with. (It's now the sort of stuff that isn't actually going to kill you, but if either Teytis or Aperture had heard of Material Safety Data Sheets, it would have a quite scary-sounding one.)

Can she command deadly neurotoxin production to start despite the lack of the management core?

[peterxy]

Yes, as central coordinator she has full control over the facility and can override any cores.

[synchrosyntheses]

That'll do then! Go forth and produce “deadly” “neurotoxin”!

She checks for anything else that the facility might be built to consider as arbitrary prerequisites besides turrets and neurotoxin.

[peterxy]

Once turrets and deadly neurotoxin are back online, she will be able to maybe work on deadly lasers, or the Aperture Science High Energy Pellet launchers and catchers. Or plates, everyone loves plates. Maybe even panels.

[synchrosyntheses]

Time to “fix” the turret production line; she turns her attention to the part of her that's heading there.

Any interesting sights to see along the way?

[peterxy]

Dead destroyed test chambers, mostly, nothing she didn't see on her way up.

[synchrosyntheses]

Oh well.

When she gets to the turret production line, she looks for what caused the jam, and how it is organized — what steps are involved in production of a turret.

[peterxy]

The jam was apparently caused by: plants.

Turret production happens in stages: first the casing is built. Then the personality module is added, and the motion detection. Then it is filled with bullets. After that happens, it is verified against the template, and if it fits, it is boxed and sent to the turret storage wing.

[synchrosyntheses]

—and if it does not fit?

[peterxy]

It is thrown into an incinerator!

[synchrosyntheses]

Would that be the same incinerator that is currently not working?

[peterxy]

Yes, the very same!

[synchrosyntheses]

The incinerator has cameras to watch turrets die with, right? Do they perhaps show a pile of defective turrets, or did the incinerator stop after the turret line did?

[peterxy]

Right! But the incinerator stopped after the turret line did, yes.

[synchrosyntheses]

Okay, how about — some incomplete turrets that have been sitting around the jammed section?

She wants to interview a turret.

[peterxy]

There are a couple! Is she going to be physically in sight?

[synchrosyntheses]

These haven't been filled with bullets yet, so — still no. She's being the coordinator, it's her job to be the voice in the air, not the intruder (er, test subject, sigh) trying to justify not being shot at.

Activate the room's speakers and say “Hello.”

[peterxy]

"Hello," both turrets say at the same time.